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This is the original transcript of Maharaji's comments on the second day of a training session that took place in Arundel, England, in 1999. The transcript was written by Chuck Nathan, and the only edits that have been done are the replacement of attendees names with initials, and a few very obvious spelling corrections.
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M COMMENTS
UK SESSION #1
7/24/99
M pointed out to Chuck that electric cord for G3 was in the way.
9am
Good morning everyone. So we did our homework? How should we do this?
We've got 71 people, so we need to figure out how to do it most efficiently.
(Someone suggests writing homework on flip charts)
Well that would actually take longer because it would involve writing and saying it. So with 71 people, what would be the most efficient use of time?
(Someone suggests breaking into small groups to review homework)
OK, break down into groups of 10? OK, let's do it.
(Someone suggests all breakouts happening in the main room)
Usually I let you go on the trail until you find it's impossible to do, but I'll save you some time. Maybe I'm weakening. That won't work. It gets very intense with everyone talking at the same time.
How long do you think we need to do this? So is there a picture that has emerged? Is anyone keeping track of the picture that has emerged? Or is everyone just going on with their ideas?
I heard some of the guests actually had some of their chairs removed from their rooms.
(Someone says the team was asked to break into small groups)
Were you asked to break up into groups? Asked is different. Suggested is different. Why are you disagreeing while the guy is still talking?
Well you've already blown 15 minutes and you haven't decided anything yet.
(Comments)
So what was the homework? How to make the team work more smoothly? And you've done your homework. There are going to be days when you feel you've woken up on the wrong side of the bed. He said 25 minutes. According to my watch it's now 22 minutes.
He's wearing a Rolex which are notorious for not keeping good time. It has mechanical gears. When they heat up, the gears don't work accurately. So it's now 22 minutes, 50 seconds.
(Comments)
How many groups are we going to have? And what are trying to accomplish here? Do this more efficiently?
(Comments)
I know V said this word exercise. Is this an exercise? You're not going to find it in any computer, any notes. You're not going to find it in any prior training. I'm just asking you as a normal human being, what is the most efficient way to present your homework. It's now gone to 26 minutes. Now it's become a game. I'm just asking you as a normal, sane human being. But this is good. We'll have to make this an exercise. Anything that fucks you up has to be an exercise right?
We're coming to the point where we could have had everyone individually present their homework.
If I decide to drive on the right hand side in England what would your suggestion be? How about getting on the correct side of the road? Even though I decided to drive on the right hand side, would you have the gall to correct me? Correct me? Yeah, you just did. I tell people to keep an eye on me when I have a left hand drive car. So I said I think that's a great idea to break up into groups.
If he came up with an answer, fucking ducks will all make us work better, that's his opinion. Now don't go try it.
You're obviously uncomfortable. Why don't you say something? So you're just going to remain uncomfortable?
(Comments)
Have you actually every done that? Where each person says one thing and you can't repeat that? The reason is I just had people do that in the Miami training. I had people say one thing and then not repeat what the other people said, but it didn't work. For example, one person could say fuck the ducks, then the other person could say fucking ducks, but it's phrased differently, so it doesn't work for people not to repeat others.
(Someone says M approved the idea of breaking into small groups.)
I didn't approve the idea. I just said it was a good idea. You're now at 34 minutes.
(Comments)
(In response to someone saying they must be bad because M turned on computer while the participant was speaking:) No, no I'm just turning it on. I have to turn it on. The presentation is on there. It has nothing to do with you.
(Comments)
Do we need to take a break? Let's take a 15-20 minute break. No discussion. 20 minutes.
(Comments)
10:10am
(Comments)
Enough is enough. You guys are a bunch of disgusting assholes. This is how you operate. This is how you think. How can you be proud of this? Don't shake your head, you are part of it. You are part of the asshole equation. This is what you offer me. Every single time this is what I get. Do you like it?
Who's doing this? Am I?
Why are you doing this to yourself? You are laughing about it. If I was sitting in one of those chairs, it would be incomprehensible for me to continue to sit there.
So far has anyone, has anyone brought any strength into this team? You have all brought your weaknesses. You know what the facilitator observations are? You are gathering evidence that the team won't work. There's no clear thinking. You never listened to the instructions in the first place. And now you are going on making up your own instructions on what you wasn't to do.
You keep saying to each other, listen but you don't listen. You have no concept of the value of time. You don't care about wasting anyone's time. Half of you have left the process. The rest of of you are going around in circles talking. What are you doing?
You've already made this into an exercise. You are convinced that it's written on some piece of paper that that's not true. You are convinced that we are out to trick you, that this is an exercise. But I already told you that as a normal sane person who has their four cups of coffee in the morning that this is a simple task to be done in the most efficient way.
This is reality. This is how you operate and this is what you offer. Me. Month and month, year after year, this is what I get on my plate.
How long do you suppose you would have pone on? You have no clue do you? And you have no regard whose time you are wasting. You don't care if you waste my time do you?
You're trying to prove the team and unanimity doesn't work. You don't care about M's time, you don't care a fuck about what he's asked you to do. You don't care about other people. This is what you've proven. I think it's a very said situation. Extremely.
With a task at hand, what's been asked is extremeely simple. You've already been told there are rooms, flipcharts. But you're going around in circles. Do you realize the turns you've been taking? How can you even change a diaper if this how you operate? Where is the teamwork? Whre is the team? This team is out to destroy each other. You don't feel any passion. Not a trace of that. More the time goes by, the more you choke each other.
Do you realise this task requries team effort because each person has something to say? Now let's bring it together efficently. But you don't care about that.
It seems like you have a hidden agenda. You came with that here.
This is a very very very bad situation.
And nobdy put a stop to it. How can this be? How many times has S gotten up and said I agree with C? Anybody count? When we already decided if we agree we shut up. If we disgagree, we say so.
What the fuck is going on here? Uncomprehendable.
I feel that we cannot continue under these circiumstances. We haven't even started the exercises. So far the only exercise we did was with the envelopes. That was terminated. We're just doing real McCoy stuff and you can't do it.
You want to say anything?
It drives me nuts, him saying I agree with her. In a few minutes, I agree with her.
Fuck, he's not even listening to anybody else. I don't get it. I don't know what this game is that you are playing. Then we had a therapy session. Then we had a joke. Is this how we want to spend M's time? Whose time are you wasting?
You know what I was supposed to be doing -- programs in Adubian, Ghana and South Africa and K sessions. I'm here. And this is what I'm putting up with. And on top of that you're wasting that time too. The programs in Ghana, South Africa, Mauritius, they weren't ficticious. The halls were booked.
I really don't understand this logic. I tell you a simple thing to do and you won't do it. You want to tear each other apart. You want to prove to everyone how full of shit they are. I've go to to ask myself why I'm here.
There is very serious. Extremely serious.
I don't understand. You're not serious. You already did this yesterday. Do you know how long ago a proposal was made to explore? Any idea? He made it. He said, like yesterday maybe we should explore. Why wasn't S listening to him?
Do you know as part of the setup, you're going to have to break into groups. Do you know you were going to be broken up into groups? What did you do the first day? So the idea of groups was nowhere near your mind, right?
Is this an Irish thing? Your're Irish. The French are assholes, right? The Englsih must be assholes? The Germans. If an Irish person speaks, great.
And he has no clue why we're breaking into groups. He's totally disengaged. Thinking what a bunch of assholes. Is that teamwork?
You want discussion, you want to argue. That's teamwork?
Do you realize what a footballer is asked for? It's his body he's being asked for. He's going to be hit by four 3000 pound gorillas. Have you ever seen them carry people out in stretchers? Do people think the coach is an asshole. What are they going to do, seeing their buddy being carried away on a stretcher? What are they going to do? Go on and play. That's teamwork. They'll compensate for these guys.
And here you here, you're not being asked to tackle anybody, just a very simple thing. And you still haven't done it.
That's really something else. Here we are. Another break time. Let's take a 15-minute break.
11:15am
You don't seem to recall what I actually said yesterday. Don't make the same mistake twice. That's the point of it. Don't make the same mistake twice. You did.
(Comments)
Do you know what you did right? Then why did it go in the direction it did? It's a straightforward question. A pilot comes and crashes and totals the airplane. I don't know what I did wrong. I thought I was doing everything right. Was he doing everything right?
You could have stopped that process from going on. Did you? You made other comments. You knew how to make those. Why didn't you say "This is going in the wrong direction. Let's stop." If that doesn't
work, you get up again and say it again.
I'm talking about that specific situation, that we just endured a few minutes ago. It may not apply to other situations.
We had a tremendous amount of brain farts.
So what do we do? I hope I didn't say it out loud, but what you thought you were doing right was wrong. When you do something wrong, when you run with the ball the wrong way, the team suffers, everybody suffers.
So where do we go from here?
(Comments)
You understand what he said? You don't have a problem taking the break. Wbut when a task is placed in front of us, we have a tremendous problem with it. When we take a break, we leave as a group and come back as a group, ready to go.
So what do we do?
(Comments)
I agree that would have been valuable. But whatever you decided would make the team more efficient, you didn't apply. So I don't know if you want to dsicuss that. Obviously it doesn't work for you.
(Comments)
Seems like you're severely lacking any kind of structure.
(Comments)
So you want to make some rules? Operating structure? How many don't?
(One person says no)
So you don't want any help? You don't want any rules? You said rules are just a help, it really has to come from inside.
How many of you think it's important to listen to M? You've just demonstrated that that's not true. You demoed it yesterday, and again today. Yesterday was fun, it was the first day. Today was more serious.
If you know you want to listen to M, why aren't you?
Do you want structure or not? OK, let's make structure. We'll call them rules. How many of you hate rules?
So you don't have any problems with rules? You drive on the correct side of the road?
So, who is going to write? Who has good print?
What we're going to do is take down some ideas. We're not going to make rules, just write down rules.
I don't know why you didn't do it this way, we did it in India and everyone could see really well.
(Facil checklist)
I'll give you a freebee, confidentiality.
(Someone says consensus)
Unanimous?
Speak one at a time, in a loud voice, standing up, how can we consolidate that? OK, respect.
(Someone says put M first)
These are not the rules so don't take this down. These are just ideas.
See you should have thought before you spoke. If you had thought, you would have talked louder so everyone couldc hear you. Like you are yelling at your mother. You are in India, you have no problem, you yell at people, they yell at you. Louder you speak, the more love. You only hit those people who you love.
If you think that she can't write fast enough, then at least wait until she finishes writing. See this is what happens. You're shooting off, not thinking first. We're making rules, and breaking them at the same time. Not good, people, not good.
What if a person is brain farting? Should they not give up? These rules are being made for the team.
Listen is part of respect.
When you take a driver test, is there any part that says stay alive? There are certain things you don't have to put down as a rule.
(someone says be concise)
We have a wonderful rule for that. You get it as a bonus since you've done so well. It's called the 10-second rule. Whatever you have to say, say it in ten seconds. When L would get up and talk, I was like, I can't wait for that rule to come up. That will fix her oats.
Are you talking about being conscious? So when somebody says something people don't just bulldoze it over?
(Someone says don't be afraid)
Don't be afraid falls under conscious. Some people should be, some should be very afraid.
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. The guy's got a point there. Did you hear what he said? His problem is he isn't getting it. If he isn't getting it and he's pretending he's getting it, is that honest? We talked about that yesterday. You have to be honest. If you don't get it, you have to say so.
T is happy we have rules now. They're saying now we can get them.
Also no brain farts.
Can someone explain to her about honesty?
A lot of times I'll ask a question. People will say yes. If you didn't understand, you have to say no.
No no no. Never. Never. Never. Those people who want to speak, how to get up. They will never we given an opportunity on a tray. There is a time in a person's life when they have something so important in their life that everything else has to take a back seat. Hoepfully, what we are going to be engaged in, is so important, that we cannot afford to have that luxury to speak softly when something needs to be said. So that what we have to say is important, we've thought about it, it's important, and it must be said. And you get up - if you don't get that opportunity, you get up again. - if you don't get that opportunity, you get up again. Because it's coming from strength, not weakness.
You've seen some poeple have a loud voice, some less so. But when a person is clear about what they have to say, they don't mumble, they speak louder when they are clear.
There's one more rule I'll give you as a freebee, no dark thoughts. Ultimate doubts. No dark thoughts really helps me too. One time I was coming from LA to Miami. They were telling us there were huge storms over Florida. Possibility of airport closure. I was sitting there thinking, what are we going to do, what are we going to do. In Florida, you can't go back, there's ocean on both sides. One thing I was clear about, I'm not going to get into the thunderstorm. And two: what's it going to be like? I don't know until I get there. But dark thoughts were bothering me. Do I have enough fuel? Yes. Threee: dark thoughts are bothering me. What if. What if. Well, I have to see when I get there.
I could alreay see the storms. The dark thoughts, the doubts, the Ravan in us, starting gathering. I just said no dark thoughts. Within two minutes we got a call and there was a good, beautiful, clear shot.
Dark thoughts include negative thinking. You can include everything in no dark thoughts.
Don't be late is included in respect.
Leave your baggage is included in conscious.
What are we doing? We've already made the rules. Are we obeying them? This kid isn't even born yet and you're going to kill it. Now the facilitators have got guns with bullets in them. Have you seen Clint Eastwood movies? He's an amateur compared to these facilitators.
You're supposed to have them memorized.
OK so we have rules. Are you happy with the rules? Anybody not happy with the rules?
The 10-second rule is gong to get you. How many of you like it when the other person says what they have to say short and sweet? Do you like it when people blab on? And you sit there and think, cut to the chase. I find it extremely irritating. I don't think it's valid. In this circumstance, whith 71 people, that's the only way. On a conference call, that's the only way. Can it be done? Yes. Can it be done? Yes. Will people understand you better? Yes. Will your proposals go through because people can hear? Much better chance.
(Someone asks what happens in a group when one person keeps insisting on his idea) By having no brain farts. Because the chances are, that's a brain fart. Brain farts come out much louder. You fart, it becomes loud and clear.
Now that we have rules, we've got to have consequences. What good are these rules, if they don't pose any consequences? The other day coming here, the driver would slow down when he'd see a cop. Why? He wouldn't get a ticket if he slowed down. So, consequences. Sometimes in Sao paulo, they have things on the side of the highway, they'll put a dummy cop on control towers. Sometimes all the police officer has to do is park his car there and he doesn't have to go out there. OK V.
(M side comment to B) You can't hand the envelopes to be passed along
(V explains about tickets: 3 - 3 points; 2 - 10 points; 1 - 20 points; 1 - 51 points)
No tickets, you're gone, out of the conference.
You realize, it's nonlinear. First mistake, 3 points. It's extremely intimidating to have to give up a ticket. You won't like it.
(Can we win points?) You just won 100 points. You all have 100 points. You make a mistake, you lose a ticket. When you speak you'll hear beeps, it's very annoying to me. And you'll hear whistles. This is 10 seconds. "Umm (pause)…."
You don't want a conference full of epople who are just repeating themselves. Very little will be said and done.
These are conference rules that will be used during the conference. We will make up some lifelong rules. OK, we have a structure.
This is a mistake. This 10 second rule. It used to be 5 seconds. No one reminded me. So you have an extra 5 seconds.
Dark thoughts tend to be full of doubt, they bring false feelings. Typical dark thought: this team can never reach unanimity. If everyone thinks the team can't, it won't happen. This task cannot be done in 15 minutes, we need 2 hrs. Why not?
There's a big difference between dark thoughts and conscious thoughts. Your son hasn't returned home. conscious thought - should have been home an hour ago, let me call his cellphone; Dark thoughtt: he's dead. You don't want to cross the threshold into dark thoughts.
When I'm crossing Florida, I check my fuel, I know I have to go an extra 200 miles to find a clear path. Taking on extra fuel in Oxnard is conscious thought. Dark thought is I'm going to crash in Florida. There's a fine line. It can go to the other side. Concern may be a brain fart. Different from conscious thought.
I always take extra fuel. It's not a brain fart. It's a conscious thought. Brain fart can start, what if I have to go back the US on the way to Barcelona. You have to be as conscious as you can be. Life is a navagation. There are lilies, there are landmines. You should avoid the landmines. This is what we have to do as a team as well. We have to remember what our objective is, what our task is, what are the different elements we can bring into it. Whatever V and S went through, this has happened before. The fuckup has happened before. But nobody wants to keep a record of that so that it won't happen again. Here are the checklists. Do you know how long it has taken for me to persist that everybody uses checklists? A checklist is if you are not available, no problem you hand the guy the checklist and he takes over not problem. But people don't want to make checklists. But people just want to get the program over with. Then they want to debrief for 7 hours. I debrief after every flight with my copilot.
My debrief when copilot left for US, "See you later." Does that debrief cover it? There were no problems. To say what happened wrong is not the purpose of the debrief. You get a dedbriefing when yuou get off an airplane. "Thanks for flying BA. Please fly with us again." Do you debrief like that?
"I hope I never see you again" - that's a debrief. Or "I hope to see you soon." - good debrief. "I love you." - great debrief. When you say I love you and you don't hear it back, that's your debrief - you won't be taking your briefs off again.
OK, let's take a 15-minute break. Look at them, they're so happy you have the rules.
(15-minute break)
12:33pm
I want to go through these rules.
10-second rule. You go into a restaurant, sit down and the waiter keeps rambling on and on and on. By the time he finishes, you've forgetten what he said. Then he goes on and on and on again. When you've got a mission at hand, to get the food and get out, what do you wish. KISS. Keep it short, stupid. That's when your wife says "kiss." We expect that. Whne we ask for directons, we want that.
Conscious. Walk into McDonalds. Guy gets your order, drops it on the floor and then gives it to you. You want the guy to do the job right and do it consciously. Walk into a fast food store, the guy says "yes you asshole what can I do for you."
Confidentiality - you order fish, coke, - the guy yells, "do you wknow what this guy orders."
Honesty: The waiter has dropped the food on the floor. You can see lint on it. You ask him did you drop it on the floor. No, no, no.
Why do you have your thumkb in my soup? I've got to keep my thumb warm. What do you do when not serving soup? Stick it up my ass.
From any basic person, when cop stops you and says you were doing 80 and you were doing 70, you expect honesty.
You expect an honest answer from your kid. If the kid is smart he won't give you an honest answer, if stupid …
They train rats by shocking them if they touch the wrong level. If the kid figures out being dishonest keeps you out of trouble..
With my kids, if they tell me a story, I yell at them. If no story, if they tell the truth, no yelling - instead I thank them for being honest.
Participate - what happens on this team if there are people who don't participate? If you want the waiter at the restaurant to particicpate. If you wait for 30 minutes for water …
Unanimous. I'll have chicken. Waiter says no the salad is better. The waiter should say "Good choice."
No brain farts. Somebody asked a waiter once what do you recommend. The waiter said another restaurant. No brain farts. If you're asking for proper info, someone has gone off into other info, that's not what you want.
3 or 4 survivors on life boat - father sing us a song. Fat guy sings "we're all going to die.
Who likes dark thoughts when something is positively going forward?
You expect this from a McD employee, You expect this from a dog. You expect that from other people. Now other people are going to expect that from you.
Don't lose those points. It's intimidating. Don't get into dark thoughts.
(brain fart vs. good idea)
Where is the line? A brain fart is not going to be synchronzied with what is happening. Example; Everything is going along, going, along. All of a sudden, this thought marches in, we haven't been asked to do anything. All we've been asked to do is come up with the method.
If I ask for a glass of water, you say yes. Could I have a glass of water. Yes. The answer is not synchronized. It's also a dark thought. I've already told you, this is a non-sepcific training. Instructions will be given in a very abbreviated way.
In the real world you don't get all the information that you want. You don't. You have to fill in a lot of the blanks. When those blanks are filled in consciously, with knowledge not ignorance, it works out good.
R heard about a cruise, exploration cruise in the South Pacific near the Galapagos Islands. She and her husband decided to take it. They ended up on a fishing trolley. They had one little room with bunks. They were fed bait. They wouldn't let them get off. It got so bad, when other boats went by they'd ask for help. A lot of ignorance was brought into the picture, not knowledge. Research.
What do they tell you on TV? Do your research. Maybe the answers are amongst you. When exercises happen, they're like live situations.
No exercise is ever given that you couldn't do. No rocket scientists are involved here. None of the exercises require you to be a rocket scientist. Any questions about these rules?
Is this funny? What is being asked? How to beat the rules. You didn't mean that but that's what you are asking. What do you think? Is it ten seconds forever?
How many of you are trying to figure out how to beat these rules? One hand there. Honesty. Once you raise you hands later, you're getting into dishonesty. All hands should go up immediately when the question is asked.
We're trying to get the team to work. It's like trying to take clay, mix with water, create the statue and breath life into it. It's just as difficult as that. Will the clay hold itself? It doesn't want to. Right things have to be done at the right time for it to work. Too dry, won't work. Too wet, won't work.
Don't try to beat these rules. They are the only friend you've got. Facilitators are not. It's the only thing that will keep you from going at each other's throats.
Ten seconds. Not nice is it? The rules are afoot. It's happening. That got your attention. I see hairs standing straight up. All right? That one whitele explained the rules.
(V announces "The Spy in the Black Trench Coat" exercise)
Do you know how many people counted off to ten? First it was count to seven. Then all of a sudden, out of the blue, it turned to nine. It wasn't clear. Some would count to ten, some would count to nine. You started a process too early, not giving everybody the chance to focus and do it right. You've got to think like a team. What is this team about to do. The first person to cause an action to happen which is not unnanimous (eg. Getting up off the chair = leaderhsip, right) has cost you tickets.
I don't know if you understand these dynamics. If you had just taken a few minutes. The beauty of rules is, when you break one, they all start to break. Ten seconds, conscious, respect, they all go out the window. You are in a group, three people were sitting on the floor. Why? Do you know these floors are filthy? Why did you want to sit on the floor when chairs could have been availabe? Yes?
If you don't hear that person, whose responsibility is it? If you don't hear and you don't speak up, you are going to lose a ticket too.
Very interesting point here. What should the group do? Sitting on the ground context. What should the group do?
(Comments)
No, the passenger insists on sitting on the toilet during takeoff. More comfortable there. In her airline it's allowed. This passendger really hates people and wants to sit in the toilet and close the door and not let people in. The pilot is saying no you have to sit properly in your chair with your seatbelt.
How many of you are going, well, she had a back problem. So it's OK if she doesn't sit. That passenger has a legitimate problem, he hates other people and wants to sit alone.
Are you absolved? Is the group obsolved. At least put the chair there for those people. You don't have to shove it up their ass. But at least put the chair there.
People, let's not go off into our own tangent here. In every training, when it comes to the team, I have to tell you, drop it. Out of the team, be individuals. On the team, drop it.
There's a bus. The bus has ten kids, stupid, rowdy, snotty, haven't taken a shower in a week, obnoxious kids. Anybody see that movie with the female basball players, League of their Own, that kid, ten of those, obnoxious. And ten women, men women, 350 pounds each, huge, massive. And we've got anotheh 30 guys, l80 l90 pounds, strong, muscular, very very strong. The bus broke. They were travelling. They were almost there. Driver gets out. Fixes the bus. But has to take the starter motor out.
The bus driver comes to everbody. OK guys, the bus is fixed. But you have to push it because the starter motor is gone.
Can you identify the team for me? Everyone? Everyone? So what's the team is this situation?
What about the kids? The brats? They're going to tear the bus apart. They're all eating ice cream, they're going in and out of the fat epople's legs. The blubber of the fat people is going up and down.
Let's make it more interesting. Fifteen of the 30 people are standing by the side of the road?
Is the driver a member of the team?
What is the purpose of the team?
Are you guys with this? Can you picture this? Stripes, white, Mercedes. Big fat people. Kids eating ice cream, running around like bloody flies. Blubber going up and down. 30 muscular men, short, buzzs cuts., Marines. 15 are standing on the side, 15 standing behind the bus.
What is the team? What is the objective?
(Comments)
All these things are true or one thing is true?
(Comment)
That's your interpretation, but other pedople have different interpretations.
(Comments)
The fact that everybody got off is good…
When did the team get created? When they got on the bus or when they got on the bus?
(Comments)
Any time people share that common ob jective, they become a team. They get in the bus, they're going to go from Reigate to Birmingham, they're a team. They have a common objective. If the driver fell sick, wouldn't everybody at that time try to do something? Wouldn't it concern them? Any time there is a common goal, it becomes a team. They get in the bus, they become a team.
Total strangers start singing songs. In a restaurant they're huddled together. Incredible camaradarie starts to grow. You ask them, where are the passengers from the blue bus and they all say "Here".
When you go to a plane gate, how do you know that they're on the same flight you are?
Sure enough, the flight is called and everyone gets up and lines up and hands their tickets and walk in and look at their seat numbers and sit down. All of a sudden the captain says we're delayed 45 minutes and everybody says Oh. There's a dynamic, a process. A commonality. That's an extremely powerful process. The plane crashes and people are saving each other. Even with no training. So far the purpose is common.
Without even thinking about it, so much of the individuality is dropped. This guy wants to sing Camptown Races. But others are singing something else so he either sings the other song or he stays quiet. He says OK. When his song comes along, he starts singing.
Are you going to let these natural processes of team take place or not? Do you share a common objective or not? If so, why are these violations happening? Anybody who has not accepted to follow these rules?
On the first day I said you are going to have to be very conscious.
I like to study people. Look at people. People get off a coach in Israel, they dress alike. When people share a common goal. One company puts out an advert in America and England and people start dressing in similar ways.
One time I was dragged on to a cruise. The worst week of my life. I was miserable. People start to think alike. So much individuality gets dropped. If we're working for a team effort, do these teams have to interact? Do they have to know each other and interact?
Think about this. There's the pilot, copilot, ground crew, cabin crew. They might not know each other, but there's a synchronicity. Take a lunch break. One hour. Come aback at 2:31.
(Lunch break)
2:31pm
(V asks team to decide how long the team needs to strategize for an exercise.)
Mean, isn't he?
(V announces "The Blind Leading the Blind" exercise.)
(Team strategizes for 5 minutes and then does the exercise.)
2:55pm
Want to watch it? We're selling copies of this. Non-participation. There was a bunch of people who didn't understand the strategy and didn't say it. The strategy was only number one would speak until number two joined. But the team never took the time to make sure that everyone understood that.
That really busted you up. Because then people started speaking on top of each other. You had the time. You could have done it. But you lost time due to the penalties. It's like the typical scenario when a hall has been identified and security, AV, etc., are going to check it out. Except the hall liaison hasn't told everyone they have only two days to evaluate. So everyone is taking three or four days. Not everyone understands what is happening. Or people with the information wait un {text apparently missing in transcript}
Everyone done?
This isn't a difficult exercise. For the first time you have a good strategy. Someone assumed that you could hold hands. V did tell you don't assume what's going to happen over there. Strategy was good. But it was botched up.
So there are people here who have been through a training before. And yet, they are slightly impaired because they can't say everything. But the fact that they've been through a training isn't going to help them necessarily because it's a different team, different situation.
Had you asked are we all clear on the strategy. You know you have people who are English-impaired. Who is going to take the responsibility for that? You didn't, so it cost you. It's very important that everbody is on the same playing field.
Do you realize what you need to say you can say it in even less time than that? How do people communicate? Not by listening and speaking. That's the myth. In prison they communicated by morse code, tapping. When you get to a country when they don't understand Englsih, what do you do? You cut all the crap, you say water, water, water.
Language was invented to communicate. Now we communciate for the sake of communication. Now we're obsessed with how we speak the language, articulating our sentences properly. Misuse of language. You can cut all the rest of it out. Discomfort. Help. Don't understand. If you discovered a fire, you're not going to to go into an explanation of what happened. All you say is Fire. You cut the crap out. That's what you need to do. Cut the crap out. Don't get into articulating. Just say it.
There is another factor you haven't considered. It's not in the rules. It's a conscious and respect thing. After a proposal is made, I think you should allocate a period of time before another proposal can be made. 5 seconds. 10 seconds. Whatever. 10 seconds is a long time.
Things are happening too quickly. Five seconds gives you time to assimilate. Don't ask for half an hour. That's not real. Get the time in which you all feel comfortable to get something done.
I don't know where you're at. You asked for 5 minutes in the last exercise. You walked out of here in 5 minutes. That was brilliant. But then you forget the strategy. You tried to trick the exercise by holding hands. If you had just made sure everyone understood the strategy it would have been OK. You didn't take the proper precaution.
We talked about the language thing yesterday. T told you about that. Ready for second run? Cool.
No, no no no no. You can't object within 5 seconds or K will object to everything. Those 3 seconds or 5 seconds, gives you time to digest what was said. Exactly. A proposal happens. For five seconds nothing happens. Then you can object if you want to.
Do consider, the different between 5 seconds and 3 seconds is 2 seconds. This is where you have to play with it a little bit. What's the different. Very minor. OK, I'm going to let it go.
What have you decided? You have just made a new rule. You haven't confirmed. Is everybody clear on the new rule?
There wasn't even an officiation of this proposal. First it was five seconds, then 3 seconds. Then it never became official it was five seconds.
By the way the facilitators are selling the 3 point tickets, $30 apiece. See this is what I mean. It's a very important proposal. There are times when you cannot afford to have ambiguity.
Five seconds is for the proposal to penetrate the cabeza, OK? When you go pee, you're holding it and holding it and then at some point you let it go. But you've got to be over the toilet. Being in the bathroom isn't going to help you. You need to be over the toilet. Five seconds is so you can understand what is said. But nothing is said, nothing is done before the five seconds.
You have good intentions. But here is something is too important. Clarification can never be enough.
(V asks the team how long they want to strategize the next exercise.)
Oh, R, you didn't have to do that. You've been through this before.
Do you have that luxury in this world to ask for more time than you need?
You still are thinking as individuals, you're not thinking for the team. What benefits the team, go with it. You're so into being right. Should you compete against each other? You don't have to come up with being super smart, do you? Get out of your individualistic hat and see what benefits the team.
So far your response has been above average, believe it or not. Have you heard anything so dishonest before? No really, that was a true answer.
We should have a sign, "Please do not feed the facilitators."
You're really setting yourselves up. I can see it coming. D is not sure which group she is in. A proposal has been made to recount off and you've gone away from it. If you don't take care of this little problem, you won't be fulfilling the instructions that V gave you.
Unless you're multitasking, you can only do one thing at a time. Clarification first. Then move onto the next task.
(Team counts off into groups.)
You know that in the last exercise, blindfold, people started stealing each others's numbers. They forgot they were 16. So there were two people running around with the same number.
Some of you must be getting thin on points. If your strategy to not lose points is to be quiet, you can't because that's a violation of the participate rule.
This is your time. Get things clarified. Obviously things are not clear.
What's so funny? What's so funny? OK<, I like jokes a lot. But when you take a servious issue and make a joke out of it, it means you are not taking it seriously. That's a message to yourself. The message you send to yourself is this is not to be taken seriously. Therefore you won't.
Is everybody going to clap? Don't you want to designate one person? Does that person now become responsible? Does everyone else abdicate responsibility? If one person is going to keep time, are they going to listen or focus on timing? If they don't listen, how can you have unanimity? You appoint one person for 10 seconds, one for time keeper.
Have you decided what you're going to do when you're going to have to fire a member of this team because they've lost their points? Would you like to? Because the way you are set up right now, it's inevitable it's going to happen. It's not question of if it's going to happen, it's a question of when. And you will all be responsible for that person being thrown out of the team. Have you contemplated how you are going to deal with that? That person is most likely going to be in tears. And I'm not the one that's going to tell them they have to leave, it's the team that will have to tell them. So before you get into giggling mood, eat that.
What we are doing is a very serious issue. We accepted these rules. We said we will follow these rules. And we're the ones who are breaking these rules. When as many people clapped as they did, did they not bust the respect issue? And when that person has exceeded their time, have they not exceeded the respect issue? So you're already coming up with ways to get around these rules, right?
I don't know if you remember these rules were made today. The ink isn't even dry yet and already you're trying to get around. Not a good idea. I don't think so.
(V asks the team how much time they want to strategize the next exercise.)
(Comments)
(The exercise is defaulted because tables were used but never agreed upon.)
I'm telling you people, someone's going to end up with zero points. You don't want to be even close to that.
(Comments)
That's why we had everyone write their name on the tickets. Instructors, I mean, facilitators are selling them. You're starting to act like instructors.
We know that. They are history. And you are going to do it.
I think before we go into more violations we better take a break. 20 minute break.
(Break)
4:40pm
Don't hesitate to ask. Even if you have to ask ten times, ask. (M comment to P about her needing translation.)
OK people we definately have a problem. We go around in circles. We have a tremendous respect for brain farts. We actually accept brain farts much more than valid proposals.
(M distinguished between the 9 training rules vs. "understanding rules" like waiting 5 seconds after proposals are made.
Maybe people need to say each time when they start speaking whether it's a comment vs. question vs. proposal. If it's a comment you don't have to listen right? So you get up and you say "brain fart" and then say your comment.
How do you all feel? You've gotten four exercises forfeited. That's a record too. You probably have more violations in a day than any other team. A lot of brain farts are coming from right there. (R) He doesn't know the difference between his good ideas and his brain farts. Everyone says wow that person is smart. And then for five days they do nothing but brain farts. They can't come up with any more wisdom.
You got to really listen to each one and not go on a person's face. Same thing with S, C, Y, A. You guys love a leader. You want a leader.
I know this is awkward. This is like learning to walk all over again. If you are having difficulty, it's not because of the rules. It's because you've left simple sensibility.
The white balance is off on the camera.
(P brings a video to M) OK here we go. Cool stuff.
See what laughter does? An important point never got clarified. It was not clear. She said something. She was unsure, but it was going to go on and off it went.
This will take a little while. But there's ambiguity here.
When you go from one proposal to totally something else?
To how many of you was it completely clear that you were to use the easels? You've got enough of an ambiguity. Because people are not listening. So many proposals. Do you hear that proposal about how we're going to prevent people from busting their tickets.
This American Indian walks into the cheif's tent, Chief Big Feather, how do you name the kids in this this tribe. Big Feather grabged the guy by the shoulder and went outside and said if I see an eagle flying, I name the child eagle in the sky. Why do you ask, Do Not _____.
The reason for that is really very sinister. You're competing. You want to be smart. You want to come up with something, look what I said. Except in this situation you're going to end up eating shit. We are being assigned exercises that I know fouth and fifth graders could do. Nothing hard. Right? Anything anybody has to use a calculator so far? Little kids could do it. Then why are we having such a hard time accomplishing it?
If it isn't for the weakness that we bring into this team.
Have you ever seen baseball players. The guy behind the bat. You know what he's doing. Not scratching his balls. He's telling the ball thrower how to throw the ball, where this guy is at. They've got their code worked out. That's team. They don't start an argument. Not in the middle of the game. They don't say I think your wife sleeps with my friend. You think he does that? No, they just play the game.
You know little kids play baseball. Why can't you do that? Why do you get into competing against each other? Why can't you have a team spirit?
You heard the statement, whoever finishes first, wins. Why the fuck didn't you ask what you win? What if it's to sleep with a hog in it's own pen for one night. Would you like that? But it's like pre-rigged. Win. What is the prize? You know, that can really trip you up. And it did. What was the end result? Nobody won.
Do you know this happens in every team? And I have to point that out. You go to a fair and you win a prize and you get a cobra with its fangs attached. You say "I don't want that." No I insist, its yours.
Why are you competing? When are you going to make a truce? There's nothing to be benefited from competing with each other. I think you better clarify whatever needs to be clarified before we go on. It's already 5:04pm.
I'm just talking with the facilitators. Anything you want to clarify, go ahead.
(Comments)
What do you want to do with that. Let it go. It becomes a rule. A brain fart. Do you care what he just said. What's happening here guys? Everyone on vacation? Are you going to respond to this? People are abdicating responsibility and letting others do the job? Do you know that non-participaation can cost you your ticket?
So what is it going to take to get you to follow the rules and the understandings that you have come up with?
One person wants to come off as saying something smart. So they say something they think is incredible. So they say something and yes it's smart but it's at the wrong time. So it's not smart anymore. It's distracting. It's taking away.
(Comments)
Oh boy. What's going on here guys?
How important is it for you to be here? Are you just saying that because that's what you are supposed to say? I already told you there would be those times when you want to go to sleep.
How good is a good thought that kills me? How safe is a safety device that kills me? So how good are these ideas of yours that are causing you to lose points? The way you are headed -- you get three 3's and how many 10/s? How many 20's? How many 51? And then? It's over. Finished.
I'm guaranteeing you whoever loses their tickets, you're history in terms of being in this training session. I could have been doing an event. I'm here. I could be with my family. I could be resting. There are incredibly important things I could be doing. I think this is important. If I think this is important, and you don't, we've got a conflict of interest and guess whose going to win? So don't challenge me, don't push me.
I would like to know how you rate yourself as far as following the rules. One being you are having trouble following them. Nine being you are following them. I'll give you a minute to think about this. One being it's not clicking in, you're not following the rules. Nine being you are following the rules, 100%. This is a very interesting thing. It shows you where people are at. As an individual. Don't say it too fast.
We should not be afraid to make mistakes. Do you get penalized when you say the wrong thing? You really have no problem. You're creating this problem for yourself. There are these exercises where these reversals happen.
You don't get penalized if you ask. You don't get penalized if you say I think we should leave the easels in this room. Bizarre I know. In a way if you can be as you are and think of the team you won't have a problem. Example: you're a batchelor. One day you fall in love with a woman. Your whole life changes. Once you realize that she has love or friendship to offer to you, you will change. So if you realize that this team has something to offer to you. Like a jack in a car. But if you have a jack, you sure can. And what is a jack. Leverage. By having that leverage, you can move the car. The team can help you overcome your shortcomings. Suc as , no one person may be able to lift the car. But with a team it is possible. No one person may be able to make an airplane but with a team it's possible. One person cannot cook for all these people. But a team can do it. That's what a restaurant is all about right?
Where does the breakdown happen? When people put their foot down and become individuals and say no this is what I want.
The rules are your friends. The thing that is stopping you from following the rules is what you should be afraid of. These are simple rules. If you are driving your kids in a van wouldn't you like a little unanimity? Parents say stop that or I'll pull over.
It's the same thing that makes you forget, booking a hall, you forget that bad experience, and all the same mistakes are made again and again and again. The rules are the only things that stop that chain of errors. In my simple opinion, the rules are good. During my tea break, I tried to remember all the rules.
This is how I want to be. Not how I don't want to be. I want to be very conscious. I want that. I like that. I've experienced it. It's addicting. It's very high stuff. I like it when people give me respect and I like it when I can give other people respect. I like unanimity. This is what we're going to do.
In our family sometimes I say I can't come back home. And I say how would you like your birthday? And we reach a unanimous agreement. If one of the kids wants to do something, OK how are we going to do it? You only rule I wish the family followed is ten seconds. That irritates me.
Confidentiality is a measure of a person's backbone. We admire those people who don't talk behind our backs. That's a very great quality in people. Those people become our friends. These are really things we should aspire for. No dark thoughts. I am the one who came up with that. I'm shocked how so many of the saints have said, trust. I have to put in my work, but I can trust. And brain farts. It really stinks.
Someone said we should do this conference at Reigate. I said that's a brain fart. The issue surfaced again. What's a brain fart? Not a well thought out thought. Not digested yet.
The rules are something to aspire to 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. Nothing to me specifies the 9 rules you're looking at the secret formula for absolute success. And you're afraid of them? I want to get rid of that thing that's afraid of them. The thing that's afraid of them is my enemy. It's simple. It's clear.
Look at some of these attributes. Honesty. Who doesn't like that? You like dishonest people? What is the definition of honesty? I know a person who is so full of BS, every time he comes around I say, where is the bull? But I know he's honest. One of his mottos is, don't let a few facts spoil a good story.
But he's still honest. I trsut him very much, implicitly. He bullshits about everything. And he's talking and you can challenge him and he'll crack up because he knows he's bullshitting.
I don't see any reason why you should be afraid of these rules.
You've got it backwards. You are going to be thrown out if you don't learn it. It's like a pilot saying I don't want to die, so I'm going to get on the wing of an airplane. You will not be penalzied for saying something out there. For breaking the rules you will be penalized. If I start penalizing you for saying something wrong, then you should be concerneed about that. You can actually stand there for 10 seconds and say blah blah blah blah and not be penalized. You know that? Because you have been doing close to that.
When a doctor gives you pills and says take one every six hours you time {text apparently missing in transcript}
I don't think there are any excuses that are going to be considered legitimate. There's a lot of electricians who test things by touching a wire really quickly. They don't hold onto the wire. They just touch it quickly When there is a will to adapt to it, you will adapt. You really have to pay fucking attention. Which you are all capable of doing, right?
When you started driving a car, you held on to the bloody wheel real tight right? Now it's second nature. When you go into new territory you have to be careful.
The ten second rule is very difficult if you don't think about what you are going to say. If you think first about what you are going to say, the ten second rule is easy.
Telling fuck you to the cop on the street doesn't hurt. But saying something wrong to the person closest to you is very painful. And you know you could avoid it by thinking first about what you are going to say.
I realize that. That's why I'm here. I have to have a team. To do it all by myself would be impossible. And you're going to work as a team.
The conversation I just had would lead me to believe that many of you are at 2 or 3.
I think we've got a problem here. You're the only group that has forfeited four exercises in a row and you've way overrated yourself. I would not give myself more than 1.
The more I follow, the better it gets. You should average this out. You are not following the rules. What this is saying is that except for a few people there should have been no violations.
So you have had very few violations right? You also hold the record for violations.
Homework.
P, can you turn off the AC. It's getting quite cold in here.
What strengths do you bring to the team?
What weaknesses do you bring to the team?
And what you are going to do to follow these rules?
4.05 average Very high score for not following the rules, demonstrated.
Why do feel you have no strengths? You mean you do not recognized your own strengths? That's a different thing. You better be positive about your strengths and be real about it.
Do you think you are here and that is a mistake? You must bring something to have ended up here. That's why you are here. You've got to find out what that is. It's not a mistake that you are here. Get a good night's sleep. Hgow many of you think it's been a hard day? How many think it's been as easy as pie?
I think you have the ability. You're not using it. I don't know why. You're very stubborn about it. Others who recognize it, don't want to do anything about it.
If I could tell you you're on the average that would be good. But you're not. You're below average. But you think you are above average The person who is lost, when do they begin to be found? I'm a very strict believer in that.
You know Kennedy died. You know there's a lot of things he could have done to stay alive? But it's all hindsight to create the list. He ain't coming back. Analysis is for the living, not for the dead. Please people don't become history. Because I can tell you at that moment when you are fired from this team, you will find your commitment, your clarity, but it will be too late. And the team will do it. It's not an easy process to kick someone out. 102 violations. That's the record. Maybe we can set up the other team so they break your record.
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