The thing I really
noticed last night was something I have not felt
for a long time.
When we got involved with the premie committee
meetings last year, I wondered if I was going to
feel that thing I felt that drew me to the premies,
K and M in the first place. After many months of
participation, I did not feel it. Not that the
premies were monsterous, but everything was so
controlled and stifled. If you suggested live music
at an event, a church lady would give you a list of
approved music recordings. If you persisted, you
would calmly be given a list of all the reasons why
that could not happen. This would be done ever so
reasonably and politely. End of discussion.
Premies like Michelle seem to believe that Elan
Vital is the problem behind all this. But I saw
that these church ladies were attending, and even
paying for, all sorts of trainings they were going
to where they were taught all this stuff.
I saw the Atlanta seminar training video that
Maharaji did himself, where he told people that the
most dangerous time for anyone to talk about
knowledge, was when they were feeling full of
inspiration. That was when the drip became a
damnburst for me. It was CULT in capital letters,
and was also cold, sterile and dead.
Maharaji is training these people, and training
other people to train people. He runs the show,
dissent is not tolerated. The rot starts at the
top.
That feeling I could not find last year, I found
again last night. It was a feeling of love, in a
community sense. I came to K and M through the
hippy community, and they were friends to each
other, not perfect, but there was not just love for
the guru, but love for each other too. There were
huge gatherings that would come to satsang. Many of
these premies would say ''I'm only here for the
good vibes, not the 'religion''. When live satsang
stopped, and was replaced with videos, many people
fell away very quickly. That is when many of us
lost touch with each other.
It's made me think that satsang is not
politically correct edited and controled videos,
but perhaps is the fellowship of people striving to
know the truth, ANY KIND of truth, not some dogma.
People just striving to know what matters to them,
and understand and be clear about it. And to enjoy
EACH OTHER and be kind.
I think it was that fellowship that attracted me
a lot in the first place, and was what I felt last
night. Only it was even better than the old days,
because there was no Belief System in the way. As
you said Marianne, no devotional ladder in the way,
and ''No need to be anyone but who we are today, in
our imperfect lives. What a weight off all of our
shoulders!''
Last year, I had asked myself, ''What happened
to that love I used to feel?'' Now I know; WE were
it. It came from us sharing it. Too bad for M. that
he saw no value in it. Now he has sterile training
seminars, boring videos, and gives K. to a handful
of people via secret DVD, not even a human being.
Then 90 percent of them drop out. Events may stop
all together, and he will just beam his videos into
peoples houses, so they won't have to talk to
eachother, they can just love him, and send checks
to ''support his work'' without question. NEVER
question the purity of the Master.
I think you are right, Marianne, when you
said:
''Lastly, I wish all of the premies who post
here and call us hate-filled could have seen us
last night. What a shock it would have been to
them!'' Yes indeed!
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